I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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