i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Randomize
