she looked like the bat from fern gully.
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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