my soul wont recognize me after tonight
he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
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