Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Randomize
