you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
Randomize
