Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Randomize
