Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
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