Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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