i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
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