on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
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