I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
You're like the curious george of whores
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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