would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
Randomize
