I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
Randomize
