if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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