Midget sex pt 2 tonight
I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
Randomize
