My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
