the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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