I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
