he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
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