Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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