Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
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