Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
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