Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize
