My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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