I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
Randomize