i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Randomize
