What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
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