Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
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