I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
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