He is such a slut. More and more my type.
peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
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