Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
