she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
