I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
I'm on my "fiiiiirrrst" glass of wine- the quotes mean it's the last of the bottle- so I really need you to pick up your phone so we can talk about this
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
