Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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Sorry floggnaw9040 hasn't picked any favorites yet.

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(214): View more from Texas

He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.

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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.

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(586): View more from Michigan

he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...

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(224): View more from Illinois

I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am

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(908): View more from New Jersey

i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy

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(541): View more from Oregon

mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.

(925): View more from California

"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.

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(712): View more from Iowa

buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.

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(940): View more from Texas

Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.

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(479): View more from Arkansas

Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?

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