Three words: puerto rican gang bang
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
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