I'm really into asian looking animals
hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
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