Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And thatβs why I need a side dick
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP ππππ
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