Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
Randomize