sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
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