Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
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