so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
So. Much. Porn.
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
Randomize
