You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
I'm like, not good at living.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
Randomize
