She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
Randomize