let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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