People with herpes should wear stickers.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
Randomize
