There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
Randomize
