Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
