Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize
