Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
Randomize
